So I've decided to designate Sunday for answering the weeks "fan mail". The letters keep pouring in, so I'll just randomly grab a couple of the more interesting ones. Sunday seems like an appropriate day because goodness knows, I'm not in fucking church.
Letter number one, from H.B. in Plano, Texas:
"Dear TigerMoth, are you really a socialist? My dad was a socialist and he worked for U of T studying the indiginous tribes of the Southwest - just thought you might have known him."
O.K., let's get a few things straight. It's SOCIALIST, not SOCIOLOGIST. As in egalitarianism and a society where true economic equality exists. I know it's a little hard for all you little punks to figure out, but lets try (as you so love to say) to "think outside your little box".
Next, from S.R. in Bangor, Maine:
"Do you really hate people so much? What's wrong with cool music and clever jokes containing subtle cultural references? For instance, I have a T-shirt with the phrase "Tchad is Rad" on the front and a outline of the country Tchad below it. I think it's pretty funny."
This is the kind of crap that makes me want to machine gun the universe. World poverty is at it's peak, the rich are on a power grab unequaled in human history and we're busy doing our best to kill as many brown people as possible in the name of "freedom", but you're too busy buying some stupid ass shirt. I know it's awfully "Uncle Joe" of me, but idiots like you need to hit the gulag for a litte re-education. Maybe a little hard labor would cure you of your consumerist nonsense.
Goddamn, let's get to letter #3 from K.P. in Sonoma, California:
"Congratulations on your upcoming wedding, I don't know how (s)he puts up with you..."
Sometimes I don't know either, K.P., all I know is that I'm a lucky, lucky person and (s)he's got more brains and guts than I could ever have. Love can be grand.
Allright everyone, get a real job and stop farting around with your life.